THE BATTLE FOR THE SHOPPING CENTRE

Okay, as promised …..
Here it is.
My epicly awesome blog post of extreme hilarity.
Which really probably isn’t that funny to just read about.
Had to be there moment and all that.
But still ….. brace yourself.
Are you ready for it? Because it’s here……

 

THE BATTLE FOR THE SHOPPING CENTRE

 

So Ruby-Rubes and I were chillin at the shopping centre, in the children’s toy section to be exact ( ‘cause that’s just the way we roll) trying to decide if firing speed or clip capacity is more important in a Nerf gun. In a perfect world, we would all have enough money to buy a Vulcan (the father of all Nerf guns) and then we would have both. Unfortunately, this is reality, and both of us are poor as we don’t have enough work ethic to get a job with which to fund our nerdiness. We had finally decided on which guns to buy (stampede for me, barricade for Ruby) when she spied the guns which fired glow in the dark bullets, which led to another hour of deliberation about whether to spend the extra ten pounds on a glowing gun. Eventually, she decided that the price was too steep for her meagre budget, and I was ready to get the hell out of there, when I spied superhero masks.

They were so beautiful I felt like crying. When Ruby saw them she almost had a heart attack, then she had another one when we discovered they were only 15 pounds. We knew that we were both really too poor to spend money on these things, but they were just so beautiful. In the end I got a Spiderman mask (and was also really tempted to get web blasters – Ruby was forced to talk me out of it) and Ruby got an Ironman one.

Walking out of the shop with them, I was pretty sure I had just quadrupled in awesomeness.
(I can hear you all going ‘where is the funniness? The hilarity we were promised? This is already practically an essay, and I’m bored out of my brain.’ Just be patient, young padawan. It will all come.)

Originally we were planning to leave straight away, but Ruby decided it would be best to take a detour to the bookshop to see if the price on those cloth-bound harry potter books had gone down yet. At the moment they were sitting pretty at 120 pounds, and Ruby was still seriously considering getting them, despite the fact that she already owned the entire series in hardback. Originally I had attempted to dissuade her, but then she told me I could have her hardback ones if she got these new ones. My current Harry Potter collection was paperback and dog-eared, and the half-blood prince (the best book in the series by far) was missing it’s entire front cover.

I shut up pretty quickly after that.

So, in short, we took a detour.
And thank the Lord we did.

 

You will figure out why in my next post because this one is already too long.