I have just discovered something marvellous!
This incredible innovation is certain to change the lives of slacking teenagers
everywhere! The Intelligence Pill™ is guaranteed to make you 95% smarter than
you really are! Ace tests, wow your friends and just generally be amazing! The
Intelligence Pill™ retails at only one billion pounds per pill, and will (most
likely) be shipped to your house within a hundred years of purchase. Buy The
Intelligence Pill™ today and you WON’T regret it.
Okay, so maybe I don’t
really have a pill that will make you super smart (I wish), but I DO have
something EVEN BETTER.
Super long cool sounding words.
They make you sound like a genius, but they are completely FREE. I
myself am quite sesquipedalian (given to the use of long words) and when my
friends and I confabulate (discuss something) they often find me quite prolix
(tiresomely wordy) as they say my extensive vocabulary is otiose (serving no
useful purpose).
Here are some of my favourites:
Gallimaufry: a collection of odds and ends
Prestidigitation: sleight of hand used while performing magic tricks
Chthonic: dwelling beneath the surface of the earth
Pusillanimous: lacking courage or resolution
Hebetude: mental lethargy, stupidity or sluggishness
Esurient: extremely hungry or greedy
Ratiocination: the process of logical and methodical reasoning
Some people may find this pointless, but for others, it may be their
quiddity (the distinctive quality of someone or something). I mean, imagine
complaining to your mother about how obstreperous (noisy and unruly) your
siblings are. You may become invidious (likely to arouse resentment or envy)
which could make you lugubrious (extremely mournful or sad), but think of how
astonished your friends and family will be at your new-found intelligence! Just
pop a couple of these beauties into an assignment, and you’re pretty much
guaranteed and A! (no promises).
So use this cheaper alternative to The
Intelligence Pill™ and I assure that you’ll be amazed by the results.
Oh my goodness, I love these words.
ReplyDeleteHmm ... I especially like "quiddity," although my all-time favourite word is still "petrichor." :)
I followed you blog, and would like to invite you to follow mine
ReplyDeletehttp://abominabledragon.blogspot.com/
And those words are awesome. I'll have to keep them in mind. My favorite is ratiocination.